While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Randomize