Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
