I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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