So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Randomize
