can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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