Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
As shirtless as possible
the night ended with taco bell and tears
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
