do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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