it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
Randomize
