he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
