i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Can't be like "hey can you elaborate on this three year old tweet" can I?
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
