girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
