What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
only if we run a train.
done.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize