dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize
