Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
