I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Randomize
