Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
