I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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