this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I should be sponsored by Trojan
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
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