things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Randomize