Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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