Cold hands, warm shart.
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
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