I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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