my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
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