it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
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