we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
