she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
