took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
She is beauty she is grace
she’s masturbsting in front of an open window while drunk af 9am
i thought you had class
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