Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
