well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Randomize
