so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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