I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
