They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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