i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
