As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Sacagawea was the original milf.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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