Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
pray to the hookup gods
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
