i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize