Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
