i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
