We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
