I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
everyone is single if you try hard enough
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
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