Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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