doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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