I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
