So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Houston, we have a blender
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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