Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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