Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
