dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
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