I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
my poor anus
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
