it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
