so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
